I have a "friend" who, occasionally, uses her cleavage to hold things for her.
The other day, my "friend" noticed that a light bulb needed to be changed in the hallway, so I...uh...she went in the kitchen, grabbed a light bulb, and chair, and went down the hall to change it.
"Oh my!" my "friend" said to herself.
"That light is way up there, and it has three parts I have to hold while I switch light bulbs!"
Then she gets a brilliant idea.
"I know! I'll put the light bulb in my cleavage while I take all the parts off!"
Genius, no?
She proceeds to remove the light fixture parts, unscrew the burnt light bulb, place it next to the new light bulb between her bosoms, then grabs the new one to screw it into the light fixture.
I noticed...uh, I mean she notices that the light bulb has gotten...hmmm...how shall we say it?
Moist.
Okay, it was a bit sweaty in her storage place, so she wiped off the light bulb before she screwed it into the light fixture.
So, my question to you is-
Would my "friend" have gotten shocked had she not wiped off the slightly damp light bulb?
She'd like to know.
40 comments:
prolly.
maybe you'd have had a little fireworks show when you turned the light on.
I only use my cleavage as a crumb catcher......were we not counseled to have a storage of food on hand? My bosom helps me comply.
I have no idea. I don't know that I really want to know.
Recently I saw an unfortunate girl use her cleavage as table decoration at Chili's. The poor server had no idea where to place her plate. I wonder what her date thought about having to eat in front of that all evening.
Your friend poses a very good question. I think she should try it and see. What's a little shock, for research's sake?
Unless it was dripping wet, I think your "friend" would not have received a shock, but it is quite possible you.. er she would have had to change the lightbulb all over again.
pockets... need i say more?
Before I answer your question, I would like to add that I used my cleavage in my last couple of auditions. I had barely time to change mouthpieces in a particular excerpt and there's no place closer and easier to grab from. And it stayed the perfect temperature so as not to chill my chops as soon as I put my lips on it. Gotta be resourceful, I always say!
Anyway, Harlan and I discussed your question, I mean, your friend's question this morning.
If the light switch is off when replacing the bulb, "as it should be" or the power is off, there's no chance of shock.
If you were touching the light bulb when it went on and it were wet, you are "probably" safe, however, be reminded, water and electricity -- bad idea.
Two extra rules to live by:
Don't put a light bulb which has recently been on down in your girls unless you like singing them (as in singe +ing, not "la, la, la").
If you spray cold water on a hot light bulb, it'll explode and glass will fly everywhere, thus Harlan wants me to add, if you were a life form that was not warm-blooded, you, I mean, your friend, wouldn't want to store a hot light bulb in your girls unless you had really tough scaly skin or an exoskeleton. :)
Hmm...tell your friend "maybe". I just don't know! Your friend has many talents! :D
You gave me such a good idea that I tried to use my clevage to hold something and then I realized my clevage was missing..where did it go? did I ever have any?..when did that happen?
Oh how unuseful we flat chested women are. I guess I will have to use a pocket.
I just keep thinking of the old movies where big bosomed women pull things out of there, seems it was a prehistoric kleenex box.
lol. tell your "friend" she is a genius. unfortunately if i tried to put something in my cleavage it would fall right down to my toes. cuz cleavage does not exist on the aubrey. wanna share?
I only have cleavage if I have a reallllly good bra on (or maybe a really bad one?). You're so blessed.
I thought you were gonna say your "friend" smashed the litebulb in between her boobs. That would have been a cool story!
probably not unless the light was on.
EWBL I refer to my own cleavage as crumb catchers, b/c at times that seems it is all they are good for.
Aubrey and I share the same lack of bossomness.
Your friend usage of her ample cleavage as an storage device reminds me of my grandma, she did that all the time.
:)
LOL! That was the funniest story I've heard all week!! :)
If I could.....I would test the theory for you....maybe I have a "friend" who could take one for the team for me....then I will get back to you on this one.
I feel so dirty.
I think your "friend" should try it again only have someone else put the lightbulb in for her and see what happens.
"Your" friend is very resourceful. I think I'll remember that;)
If you "friend" had been shocked with a bolt of electricity and plunged unconscience to the ground, the local fire department would have been shocked indeed finding a woman with a burned out bulb between her busoms. Rest assured that they would have worked extra hard to save your--ahem, pardon,--her life just to get the rest of the story.
My husband had a patient visiting him for a breast exam. When she disrobed he saw she had a burn mark about 1" wide and 10" long running across the widest portion of her breast. In answer to his puzzlement, she related the embarrasing incident. As she was getting out of the shower, the timer for her cookies was ringing. She ran, au natural, into the kitchen, grabbed the hot mits, flung open the oven door, and while simutaniously bending over and grabbing the cookie sheet out, her breast swung onto the hot cookie sheet, leaving the lovely stripe across her busom.
Large bosoms can be useful and quite dangerous. Beware!
So how many "girls" does it take to change a lightbulb? I guess they were getting a little sweaty with all the work.
cleavage? what is that? I have craters...no bosoms here.
Oh dear. Trixie's story has me laughing and crying at the same time.
Hmmm... that is an interesting question. I would suggest that you contact your state officials and see if you can get some federal funding to study that question.
If this was me, the old light bulb would be hot when I took it out and I would burn my cleavage!!
Oh gosh Trixie... hope that woman doesn't read this blog! I can totally see that happening, and now I know I will never EVER cook naked (not that i ever have) or even take a shower while the cookies are in the oven.
And just like how many licks it takes to get to the center of a tootsie pop, the world may never know.
Or is that not something you want associated with your cleavage?
maybe you *ahem I mean your friend do it again and find out ;) hehehe
So...did she try again and is now hospitalized? And guilt is keeping you from writing a new blog entry?
Trixie's story is beautiful!!
How you doin' over there??
I'm worried about your friend. Forget being shocked - what if she'd moved a certain way and squished the light bulb? What if it broke and she was cut by tiny shards of light bulb glass? How would she ever explain that?
Then again, who would ever see it that she'd have to explain to?
How's your friend's medical coverage? Is "squished light bulb between the chestal regions" covered by insurance?
Did the light bulb smell funny? ;)
P.S. Someone should create an apron with a pocket up top so it looks like you're putting stuff between two giant chesters.
Oh, this has been a painful post to read (images of burnt bossoms and flying shards of glass)! I'm of the opinion that you would not have been shocked but the light bulb might have burnt out (doesn't that sound likely? Zap and it's gone?). And the punster in me wants to say, "You wouldn't have been shocked, but I was when I read your post!" but, alas, not shocked. Not shocked at all.
"Anonymously,"
Marianne
heffalump... i think you're onto something
Carrot??? what happened? where are you! we miss your posts!
Hello?
Helloooo?
Anyone home?
/Door is unlocked, so let's self in. Eats cookies and fries some bacon!
BACON!!!!
No way! burn out the new bulb, maybe.
Where did you find your wallpaper?
I love it! I am a child of the 50's and it all rings bells for me. Thanks for an enjoyable browse!
/Cooks even more bacon (for BLT sammich)
//Play Apples to apples (by herself I might add)
HMMMPH
huh?
All I know is that you I mean uh your "friend" is not alone I used to do that all the time. I just have to say you are lucky you didnt put the moist one back in. :D
Mom! I am surprised at you
-second oldest
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