So I say to my "friend", "That was good sushi. I really liked it!"
and my "friend" is all, "Yeah, I could tell you like it. You had like four pieces."
And then I'm all thinking to myself, "Hmmm, how much sushi is too much?"
It's like the size of a half dollar, right?
So if I had four, I don't even think that's a 1/2 a cup of rice, right?
Throw in 1/4 sliver of avocado, 1/8 strip of smoked salmon, and some other crap wrapped in seaweed, eat four of those and that's obscene?
Boy is my face red.
I supposed it's bad to eat four quarters of a sandwich too.
Maybe I should stop at one triangle instead of eating the whole thing next time.
Don't want to over do it.
Speaking of the Chinese New Year party, I've decided I'm really good at faking games.
Oh yes, it's true.
I can totally make it through a whole game not having any idea how to play it.
I'm a good faker.
We're playing this roll the dice and turn over a card game (I don't even know what it's called), and I almost won.
Almost.
The last lady rolled the dice and turned the card over and beat me.
Whatever.
I'm still good.
I just say things like, "Okay, now what am I supposed to be doing?" or "This is good, right?" and "Now I'm going too...hmmm..." and inevitably, someone will tell me what to do.
I freaking don't even have to pay attention.
How great is that?
I can tell someone to quit being a baby and try the sushi, talk to my girls, and play a game I've been forced into playing while not knowing what's going on and still come in second.
You're glad you know me, aren't you?
Wait, don't answer that.
Oh wait, you can't answer that.
Ha.
I'm good I tell you.
Good.
