Do you ever think about the second amendment?
I did last night.
I wondered why we have the right to bear arms.
Why not monkey arms?
They seem much more handy than bear arms.
Sure, you could claw the heck outta somebody, but what if you wanted to cross stitch?
You just couldn't.
I tell you who has it bad.
Gingerbread men.*
Those guys have no joints, and no fingers.
Even if they had fingers, they couldn't pick their nose's, because they can't bend their arms to get in there.
Don't act like you've never picked your nose.
And what's with people using raisins on gingerbread men as eyes, and buttons?
How good do you think you could see if you had raisins as eyes, huh?
Dried fruit in cookies is always disappointing anyway, so why do it?
Haven't you ever reached for a cookie, bit into it, and there was a craisin stuck in there, and you're all like, "Oh. That's unfortunate."
Is it so hard to pipe some frosting on and make eyes for the little guy?
It's the least you could do for someone who can't really use his arms.
On second thought, maybe raisins block out dirt from getting in there. Can't really rub your eyes if you can't bend your arms, eh?
I'm feeling really bad for gingerbread men right now.
It's one sad cookie.
*Yeah, I was watching "The Secret Life Of Gingerbread" at 3 a.m. Wanna make something of it?
P.S. How weird is it when you see people from neighboring towns reading your blog, and you don't know who it is? Very weird indeed.
Like I could say, "this is where I'll be on Saturday at 7:30", and they might very well show up. Hope their not crazy. But you are invited if you'd like to come.
I'll be the big hairy Tongan with the shotgun in the corner. ;)
21 comments:
Poor Gingerbread man...raisins just add insult to injury.
I didn't know you were Tongan! ;)
Thanks for bringing these important matters to our attention. Even gingerbread men have rights. They are 'men' afterall and all men are created equal.
I am so glad I'm not alone in my hatred of dried fruit in baked goods. ick.
Oh, carrot, how I've missed you! *sniff* "bear arms." Yes, I've missed your brain.
And what are you doing with that shotgun, anyway? It's not loaded, is it?
it may not be loaded, but it seems our dearest Carrot is, lol
Carrot... step away from the cold medicine!
They couldn't pick their nose's what?
Perhaps you should start a charity to raise awareness for the plight of the gingerbread man. You could have guest speakers come and educate the public. Perhaps throw in a fun run to raise money to rehabilitate gingerbread men who have lost limbs due to their lack of joints... the possibilities are endless.
I had 4 hours of sleep last night. I think I could come up with a lot more ideas for this if you'd like me to... I'm all about helping out!
"Oh. That's unfortunate". That's such a classy, respectful response to nasty dried up fruit in desserts. You probably never fling things and swear.
And also, you think about the medical necessity of raisins for eyes, I mean, who HAS that kind of clarity at 3 am?
When I moved to Iowa I found someone from the next town STALKING my blog and I got a little nervous. I mean, I had JUST moved here.
Turns out, it was me. And I'm a dork. My sitemeter suddenly stopped ignoring my visits.
"I tell you who has it bad.
Gingerbread men.*"
Bwahahahahahaha.
For the love of Gingie!! X out the craisins....besides who ever thought that would be a good idea in the first place? Raisins I like....but I like them as grapes before they mutated into dried sad little lumps....Cranberrys should not be allowed the same demise...Cranberrys are not sweet in their juiciness to begin....then mutate them into smooshy and dried, and THAT might make them better......who is in charge around here?
They're right remain in tact around here, no-one is going to eat something that looks like a person.
Cheers
This is my calling card or link"Whittereronautism"until blogger comments get themselves sorted out.
I'd say the freeway is closed from me to you so I'd not be able to make it to your fiesta.
I tried to make gingerbreead men last year. It turned out pretty bad. Forget about bad, they were un-eatable.
Mine didn't even have raisins :(
I'm standing up for the raisins. I think they have it hard enough, wrinkley old grapes they don't need criticism.
LOL. At 3 am I'd be thinking about what store was open to relieve my suffering. You have great and funny thoughts. Will you be staying up tonight as well. I'll need a good laugh then, too.
cinnamon red hots!
we don't even cut the cookies into the shape of gingerbread men anymore - we cut little piggies [cuz that's what we are] then we load them down with as many red hot cinnamon candies as they will hold. yumola - nothing tastes better on gingerbread than cinnamon red hot candies.
no matter that the piggies see red - we just eat 'em fast anyway - cuz, we're piggies.
[raisins prefer to reside in oatmeal cookies anyway]
you are so funny. i enjoy my visits to your blogsite.
I always find it unfortunate to find fruit in baked deliciousness.
Also, I too find it frustrating to see people reading my blog from nearby cities. I never knwo who it is! Wyy don't they just comment! Ahhh the frustration.
raisins in cookies are just wrong. Always substitute chocolate chips!
Because monkeys were writing the bill of rights? Or the men were afraid our ancestral primates would be offended? oooh, I can tell I'm going to ruffle some feathers.
Raisins...like putting flies in cookies. Yuck. That's why I use chocolate chips (point down, into the dough) for eyes.
Oh how I've missed you!
Raisins for eyes...seriously, how wrong is that? We should start campaigning against it...I'm up for a picket line, how about you?
Maybe in the Spring...
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