I should blog about my whiskers.
Oh yes, I should.
My thumb can't seem to stop canvassing my neck for them.
It's got "obsessive compulsive whisker finding disorder",
and there's not stopping it.
Believe me, I've tried.
It doesn't care who I'm in front of.
Visiting teaching?
Who cares! I feel a whisker!
The bad thing is,
it's beginning to feel like a game of "Whack-A-Mole".
Pluck it, another pops up.
D'oh! You got me, but look over there!
*sigh*
It is the hair that doesn't end.
It just goes on and on my friend.
Somebody started plucking them, not knowing what it was
and they'll continue plucking them forever just because...
Never, and I mean NEVER do I have tweezers when I find one.
I need to travel with a pair of tweezers and a super magnifying mirror like my sister has.
I knew my skin was bad, but I didn't know it was THAT bad until I took a look in her mirror.
Holy crap! I've got huge flakes of skin sloughing off!
I need moisturizer, STAT!
At my house, I never use moisturizer, but put a super magnifying mirror in front of my face, and I not only need moisturizer, but a face lift to boot.
I do not want to get any older.
I was at Fred Meyer trying to find light bulbs today. I decided to pass a man having a hard time with his "Little Rascal" scooter. Right as I got along side of him, he jerked foward, so I took that as a challenge."Oh, did you want to race?" I said.
He looked at me as if I was serious, and said, "OH no! I'm just trying to figure this thing out."
Poor guy. I think I scared him.
I hope when I'm old, I can race people in those things.
No clerk would stop me, because I'd be old, and I could just say, "I'm just trying to figure this thing out." and then take off real fast.
Because I'm a spaz.
Oh yes, I already know.
You thought you were keeping it a secret, didn't you?
Sorry.
Cat's outta the bag.
My sister let me know long ago.
28 comments:
I don't think I've EVER been first on your blog!!!
I never thought of my little hairs as whiskers--love the little jingle. I'll have to sing that later today when I find another one.
Whenever I look in the mirror and see the wrinkles and the droopy eyes, and realize I'm getting old, I have to remind myself it sure beats the alternative ; ) (Because I really do want to be around)
It seems you shop for light bulbs more than I do. If I told you that compact CFLs were available from Home Depot via coupons and energy conservation promotion efforts for nearly free, would you want to know more?
I love the thought of you racing through the grocery store, but maybe by the time you're an old geezer you might need this: http://gizmodo.com/381351/800-mph-jet-car-needs-just-one-thing-more-a-pilot
I am glad that I can ALWAYS come here for a SERIOUSLY good laugh! I would have said something like that to the elderly man. I feel sad when people don't get the humor. Life is too short seriously! Great post! Your comment made me laugh so hard that my daughter asked me what was so funny. I couldn't explain it to her. O you have NO idea how I needed that today!
I love the idea of you setting up races at Freddy's. It could be a new middle-aged lady exercise group. We all start down at the pet supplies and race down to the bakery (or whatever is your layout of the longest part of the store). Grannies come with racing gloves. I come wearing sweatbands.
Gee, thanks for the jingle, I'll be singing it all day...sheesh.
OH GREAT! I'll be singing the song that never ends until that hair finally stops growing! I'm weird like that & can relate to that hair. I think it must end on my big toe. Love that wild big toe hair too:) OK, that was sick. .
Bye!
Dearest carrot who loves me bestest:
You should really stop scaring people at stores.
I ripped all of my whiskers out this morning at about 1am. I found these nifty little wax strips that do a pretty good job. It gets ones I didn't even see.
now you got me feeling my face for stray hairs... i swear, the one i plucked the other day is back already :(
Hi! Oh..I so totally understand what you are saying. I HATE HATE HATE those things and I think it's a rotten deal for women to have to fight those now as well as everything else men do not have to fight. I have a SIL that in a crowded room like maybe....a THEATRE?!?...she will whip out her mirror with a light on it and start plucking away. She always was embarrassing to be around. I have to leave her and pretend I would never know her. At the very least, I go in the bathroom, turn on the light and shut the door. And I live alone!
I feel better now.
Oh, I carry the tweezers and mirror in my purse. I sneak into the bathroom and I rip those things out.
Even the white ones that aren't visible.
I can sometimes grip the hairs well enough with my nails to get them out.
My bigger problem, however, is that my eyebrows are starting to turn gray. And stick straight out like my grandpa's eyebrows did.
You would think that if I'm old enough to have gray eyebrows, that I would be too old for acne.
Apparently, that's not the case.
Oh yeah, Thanks for getting that song stuck in my head.
I have an idea:
You should blog about how I gave you an award.
But old people are happy. And maybe the scooter races are why. Tawanda!
I pluck whiskers, too. At least you pluck them. I remember when my kids were little and we lived in a neighborhood where we met at the bus stop. There was an older woman who had whiskers she never plucked out. I wanted to pluck them for her, but I never did.
oh sweet carrot. I just kinda wrote about those chin hairs too.
yours is better, it felt like I was right with you plucking those things.
I used to pluck my great aunt's whiskers out for her. She couldn't see them but she felt them and wanted them gone.
I literally own at least seven pairs of tweezers and at any given moment I couldn't tell you where a single on of them is.
I think those people in scooters are faking it so they have an excuse to bump people in the ankles and shins.
I'm glittersmama's mama. Chin hairs are the worst. I remember my mom having them, but when did I start. The thumb magnet to them is amazing. No matter where you are that is all you can think about. the magnifying mirrors are of the "debil".
And no matter how often you pluck them, they come back. And sometimes you can pluck 'at' the same spot a dozen time and never catch the little boogers and you don't think-YOU KNOW-that everyone else can see them and why do they have to show so much? I found one close to the corner of my mouth and it was black and about an inch long! Why didn't I see it before it got so bad? My head is grey. I was a blonde before I went grey. Why should a whisker be black? And why does other hair disappear from places you really want it?
Tweeze.....and the world tweezes with you.
Don't tweeze.....and you'll get hauled in by some over zealous Yeti-hunter.
LOL!!!!! YOu are so funny! I would race you!
This morning, looking in my super magnified mirror, I plucked my chin hairs, mustache, nose hairs and eyebrows and wished I could pluck my wrinkles. How come my eyebrows are getting thinner and my chin hairs thicker. Can they take hair plugs from my chin and transplant them into my eyebrows?
I can't hear any music. Is this the remake of Simon and Garfunkle's "Sound of Silence"
On your mark.... get set... GO! I would totally win one of those scooter races! One day, when we're old, we'll have to have a championship race. Maybe we can petition for it to be an Olympic event!
Have I told you lately, or ever how much I love your blog??? You are SO un-pretentious! and I love it very much... there are too many fake know-it-alls out there, and you let yourself blog about chin-hairs and REAL life... and all your friends you've gathered here are quality too!
signed...
Proud member of the "I love Carrot Jello" Society
A little old dude jumped off of his scooter and left it right in front of me today, as we were walking out the door. I almost rear-ended it with my cart. Yes, he got by with it...he's old.
I would have raced you.
Love your music:)
I'm old...and I'm constantly finding wiry whiskers on my chin that must be plucked.
I want to race you! :D
It is the hair that doesn't end.
It just goes on and on my friend.
Somebody started plucking them, not knowing what it was
and they'll continue plucking them forever just because...
Only YOU would think of that. Carrot, why are you so awesome? How DOOOOO you think of this stuff? And to say, "Oh you wanna race?" That is so bomb.
I officially worship Carrot.
No, not the vegetable...just the blogger.
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